We’re back you guys and it feels so good!
Thank you for indulging us and letting us enjoy a decadent two week mental and spiritual vacation from writing. We were both feeling very stuck and crushed by pressure and lacking ANYTHING new or exciting to talk about. But over the past two weeks we both really reinvested into ourselves and came out the other side feeling recharged, refreshed, refocused, reconnected, positive and powerful. We got back to our breakfast meetings!
So now what? We can’t go back, because we want to move forward. Tonight Jenny came over and we discussed where we want the blog to go and what we want in life. First we meditated together using my new favorite app Headspace and it really helped set the tone and help us be mindful and present. Then we snuggled and chatted it up about what we’ve learned individually over the past couple of weeks.
Here are Jenny’s revelations:
Jenny said she has turned a corner and is feeling a more positive connection with food, she doesn’t have the sugar dingers going off (no obsessive cupcake tormentors), everything doesn’t have to live so tightly in a box, I have the freedom to make the choices I want to make in peace, I want to feel good in my clothes, in my body, in my spirit, I don’t want to be number obsessed, calorie obsessed or even self obsessed as I can easily live in my own mind. I don’t want to go over and over all the decisions I’ve made and critique them over and over. At the end of the day I just want to be happy and I’m happiest when I’m just living in the moment; making the best decisions for my family but most importantly the best decisions for myself. I am so grateful for all the support I have in my life. I have the best family in the world. I have all the knowledge to make positive decisions. #happygirlsaretheprettiest
Here are my revelations (this is Sara haha)
I want more balance. I want to feel more connected in my own life. I want to stop replacing one bad decision for another. I want to feel my feelings not just think my thoughts, and to stop operating outside of my own body. Obsession is really big for me as well. The scale has been haunting me and the unnecessary pressure that I put on myself is actually making me move further away from health. I want to be less obsessed with the end result and more in-tuned with what is happening today. I Want to put healthy food into my body and healthy thoughts into my mind. I want to be less militant and more accepting of myself and others. Everyday I want to remember how grateful I am and how happy I am. I am so thankful for everything. I want to keep exploring and trying new things and meeting new people and taking care of myself. I am so grateful I get to do this with my best friend.
We are so glad to be here on every level. This is such a part of our lives now that it keeps us focused. These last couple of days we really started reconnecting bc we knew it was time. It just feels good. We think about it every single day. We both missed writing and wondered what it would be like to write again. We both wondered what it would be like to be moving forward again. We both find ourselves getting pumped up by reading old posts and reminiscing over old photos. We look forward to loving our pictures again. And motivating ourselves. I think it’s all boiling down to progress not perfection. Lets really take the pressure off, put the scale up for awhile and let our clothes do the talking. Before this journey we both would have quit when it got this hard. After all, we are learning this is so much deeper than losing weight. But we are so committed to this life that it feels impossible to quit. This is our life and we are very grateful. Nobody said it would be easy. We’ve never been in anything this long before and we both still want ti this bad, the ups , the downs, we still feel so present in this journey to conquer this road block in our life. That in and of itself feels like a huge success. You guys, we are still here and ready to rumble despite or in spite of our weight gains and health hurdles. Jenny said the goal is not 135, the goal is now to find peace with the decisions that you are making and I couldn’t agree more. Health is our goal. Happiness is our goal. Feeling good in our own skin is our goal. Inspiring ourselves and others is our goal. Kicking ass and taking names is our goal. Really getting to know ourselves is our goal. Living life limitlessly is our goal. Being active is our goal. Putting healthy things into our body is our goal.
We’ve done things we could have never imagined. We became Fleet Feet personalities, we bared our souls to strangers, we had nothing and we shared everything, we got naked and put our actual weights out into the world, we have continued to work out no matter what, our meatball nation feels like they really know us even if we haven’t met, we have been so honest about everything, we did group fitness which seemed so scary before, we juiced we gave up pasta and bread and sweets, we found out so much about the deeper underlying issues, we watch documentaries on the toxic chemicals in food, I got sober, we’re not running or hiding from our own life. We put such limits on ourselves, we were so controlling and missing out on so much. We have really accepted ourselves and the challenge. We are strong, we are unashamed and we are changed people. We both had anxiety about any social situations (for Jenny it was her body and for me it was anything new; would I fit into the booth!?). Now we are so much more comfortable and free in public. We now have a different dialogues in our minds or with our families. London asks how different foods are going to affect her. Jenny and Brandon are in a better place. I feel like I am such a more empathetic person and so willing and wanting to experience all that life has to offer.
So in closing, we have changed. Thank you for growing, moving and changing with us. We have learned that our boundaries need to be flexible and changing. We want to get better everyday. We love you so much and we can’t wait to keep exploring this! Cheers to the future!