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Two Meatballs: Go Ahead and Say It…I’m a Cotton-headed Ninny Muggins!

December 30, 2014health, fitness, beauty, motivation, plus size, make up, hair, hairstylist, oribe, bumble and bumble, MAC Cosmetics, comedy, Paleo, besties, best friends, meatballs, exercise, life change, lifestyles,awkward family photos, clean and sober holidays, elf, Family, gifts, happiness is a choice, healthy family celebrations, hi kelly, kids opening gifts, paleo christmas eve dinner, paleo christmas morning breakfast, paleo holidays, santa, snugglingtwomeatballsgetfit View all 10 comments

‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through my place…everywhere you look is a warm, loving face.

Hiiiii you guyyyys!!! Rhyming is my favorite!!! For the first time in the history of the Beards, we had a Christmas Eve sleepover at mine house. Also for the first time ever, we weren’t going to be with my sister’s kids on all Santa’s eve so to lighten the mood I invited everyone here for a yummy and healthy dinner, a screening of Elf annnnnnnnnd matching Christmas jommers!!! Me and my bright ideas! So, I woke up early Wednesday morning and went to the gym with JB from DC…victory one #survivalmode #noplussignsonmychalkboard, then I came home and set the mood #haha…

and started the pork in the slow cooker.

My house smelled amazing!!!! I even made some healthy desserts from the blog last week!!!

I have always loved Christmas baking…as evidenced by the ghost of Sara past!

Then I did some last minute cleaning and more dinner prep and all of the sudden it was 5:30 and my family arrived!!! I’m not sure if I’ve told you guys, but I like LOOOOOOVE my family soooooo much. Words can’t describe the feeling I get being around these amazing, loving, supportive, caring, funny, joyful, always on board, adorable people. Thank you to my family for letting me host…it really helped me stay on track with food!!! What did we have for dinner you say?! Well thanks for asking!!! We had Paleo crock pot maple mustard pork tenderloin from the Preppy Paleo, roasted garlic cauliflower, southern style green beans, a kale and brussel sprout salad and my first stab at paleo dinner rolls!!!! #umyummmmmmm

All of these recipes are pinned on our Pinterest account..Sara and Jenny BeardSmith and under the board Paleo Christmas Eve Menu. You guys…everything was sooo goood!

Here is our reindeer gang for the evening…my parents, John and Anna, Grandma Apple and my sister Kelly!!! I like to rank food and for sure my favorite was the roasted cauliflower!!! The dinner rolls turned out well too…more salt next time though but it was so nice to have guilt free bread for once…

and the pork was the living best!!! Now, it’s dessert time!

Then it was time to slip into something a little less/more comfortable!!! You may recognize these jommers from such posts as our last weigh in!

This brilliant idea came to me a month and a half ago while I was trying to fall asleep…spoiler alert, that’s when I have allll my best ideas and I just knew it would be a home run!!! Here is a little segment I like to call Awkward Family Christmas Photo…

We also call Grandma Apple, GiGi…isn’t GiGi the cutest!!! That face, those socks, that little teeeee-iney body…ugh!

#seemstomelike #youfraud

The ideas just kept coming…

#whatisthisaweighinshoot?!

And here are your outtakes!!!!

So hard not to laugh when you are having this much fun! It was so hot and sweaty…we turned on the AC and hopped on the couch for snuggling snacks and Elf! #dreamsreallydocometrue

All of the sudden it was 11…time for bed!!! I can never sleep on Christmas Eve…usually it’s because I’m sleeping with my nephews who moved constantly all night, but I think tonight was just excitement! This is what our childhood Christmas Mornings looked like…Santa left our gifts out!!!

In the wink of an eye, it was morning and time to make the yummiest breakfast of all time! But first I jumped into my mom’s bed…we woke up like this!

#twinning

On the menu for breakfast, Roasted Asparagus with Eggs, Bacon, Sweet Potato Hash Browns with Sriachi (sp!?) Ketchup and for a sweet treat, Coconut Pecan Bars. Again all of these delish recipes are super paleo and pinned under the Christmas Morning Board on our Sara and Jenny BeardSmith Pinterest account!

Dad helped with the bars, mom with the hash browns and Kel with the asparagus!!! #teamworkmakesthedreamwork

I mean who can feel deprived when it’s this good!?!

Everything was a hit! You know I love ranking so Asparagus all the way!!!

#wooooooof…ilooklikeSNL’sPat

Now, it’s almost time for the kids to get home!!! Let’s part ways and get showered!!!

That’s more like it!!! #iloveahomealone #youcantreaditbcitsamirrorandimdumb #merrychristmasyafiltyanimal And off to my mom’s house for Christmas! It never feels more like Christmas than at Anna Beard’s house.

Finally the boys have arrived!!! Hi Chase, hi Wyatt!

The adults in my family don’t exchange gifts…we just do for the kids and they wanted to do stocking first!

Uncle Marty and Aunt Retha came…

with sweet Harley…

And as always he stole the show! #matchingbows #someonestopmefromgettingadog!

Now on to the presents!!!

I got the kids matching jommers…Awkward Christmas Family Photo part deux!!!

Somebody look at these sweet angels!

They even made some ornaments for us…with the help of Santa Anna…

Look at all these fun toys!

Now it’s time to play!!!

We ate another amazing and healthy paleo meal courtesy of my super supportive mom!

Lemon roasted chicken with spicy roasted brocoli, balsamic glaze carrots and hasselback potatoes and the living best gravy!!! I survived Christmas without temptation thanks to my amazing family. We had such a great time together and the kids wanted to continue the tradition, so I ended up spending the night with them! Best holiday of life.

My sweet sweet family…I just love y’all to the moon!

I learned a valuable lesson this year. I can celebrate and enjoy the holidays sober and healthy and still enjoy every single minute with the ones I love the most. Hope your holidays were bright and shiny and full of loved ones. Xoxo…see you in the new year for our 10th weigh in!!!

Two Meatballs: Are We Having a Ton of Fun Yet!?!

December 19, 2014health, fitness, beauty, motivation, plus size, make up, hair, hairstylist, oribe, bumble and bumble, MAC Cosmetics, comedy, Paleo, besties, best friends, meatballs, exercise, life change, lifestyles,#tonoffun, fleet feet, heels, hi kelly, plsu size fashion, Ton of Funtwomeatballsgetfit View all 5 comments

You guys!!! We told you a couple of weeks ago that we are partnering with Fleet Feet and participating in their Ton of Fun initiative!!! We really needed some extra inspiration during the holidays to stay focused. Also, what better way to stick to your resolution than joining a company driven by fitness!!! So we met with Carrie from Fleet Feet Raleigh on Monday to hammer out some more details! Isn’t she the cutest!

Jacob, our marketing guru friend thought it would be a good idea if we met the team and you know we are always game! Carrie was an adorable gem and we became besties right away! #adultADD We talked about doing some live chats through their private facebook group for Ton of Fun, continuing to guest blog for them and now the most exciting news of all!!!

If you are free Saturday, January 3rd from 10-2 please come to the Wade Ave (Ridge Rd Shopping Center) Fleet Feet and join these meatballs for the Ton of Fun launch event….at our OWN table!!!! We get a little booth at this event…this thought had never occurred to me and now it is my obsession!!! I’m thinking an adorable table cloth, fresh flowers, glitter, before and after pics, R+Co products to raffle off and I’m currently obsessed with the idea of a life size before cut out!!! Can’t you just see it now looming behind us!!!??? Or maybe a giant paper that we can run through our former fat selves…a la Sally Jesse Raphael!!!??? This is us later on dreaming up all the possibilities on Jenny’s couch!

If you know how to make this happen let me know!!! This day is going to be sooooo fun though!!! Come see us, there will be a group walk at 10 am, a group training session at 12, lots of cool sponsors and raffles! Join us and lets lose weight together in the new year!!! Look at this amazing partnership! http://www.fleetfeetraleigh/tonoffun JOIN US!!!

Soooooo…don’t forget and come hang out with us…even if we don’t know you yet, we would love to meet you and for y’all to join us and Fleet Feet to lose 2000 pounds together!!! Raleigh UNITE (think Braveheart battle cry). Next…you guys, I wore heels today!!! This was a painful first! Heels were so uncomfortable for me before bc I was super fat and also bc my big toe bone is an inch lower than most peoples and so it creates an incredibly painful arch!!! But comfort be damned…these looked amazing. And you guys, get this…I was like soooooo tall!

So sexual! I don’t know why this was so hard for me to capture alone! #whatareyounewatthis!? Lately Jenny and I have felt so much freedom with fashion…my dream is to be able to shop in ANY store and I’m getting closer everyday! Look at us killing life lately!

Ok so how are we going to fit into even more clothing…working out with Sandra!!! What will we do today?! Well I know this with absolute certainty…it will be so motherfarting hard! So I woke up this morning after eating so clean yesterday…up a pound!!!! Dammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmit! So I was a real pill when this cutie came to pick me up this am. I expect immediate results people. If I eat healthy I lose a pound right!?! No…ok! I’ll pull it together!

We talked it out on the way and then did our usual…car selfies!

Thennnn…look who cut their hair!!! Sandra, I didn’t know it was possible for you to look hotter!!!!

Time to bust ass…treadmill warm up!

Today was 2 separate 4 round circuits! Mission one starts shoulders and chest with clean and presses…12 of these with 15 lb weights

Then lateral side raises 12 reps with 12lbs

Then push ups to exhaustion…I made it to 30!!!

Then front raises with 10 lbs…12 of these

Then bent forward side raises 12…5lbs

This circuit ended with wall sits and “steer the car” with a 5lb weight, this was 30 reps (a spin spin equals one)…

This was a real sob…then we did this whole thing 4 times…byt the end we dropped the weights down a bit.

Ok then we died…jk it was time for part 2!!! We started with low rows on the trx…12 of these!

Then this thing where you plank or get into modified push up position elbows on mat, then shift to hands…plank up downs…10 of these starting with a right arm push up lead then 10 starting with the left arm lead! These were hell.

Then 7bicep curls starting in the up position to mid way down, then 7 starting from the bottom position to half way up, then 7 full bicep curls with no swing…15 pounds!

Then we did these shoulder row things where you leaned back and then pulled yourself up with a wide stance…it went kind of like a circle…12!

Then diamond pushups…12 of these

Then roll over to the back and tricep extensions 12 of these…

We did this for 3 or 4 rounds…I honestly can’t remember!!! Then we really died…

You guys, it’s our last workout with Sandra for the year!!! Can you believe it!???

We’ve come sooooo far…one pound isn’t the end…it’s just a bad day!!!

Ok y’all!!! Have a great weekend…see you at the Ton of Fun launch and try this workout, or better yet…go see Sandra for yourself! The new year is coming!!! And one last image so we don’t look like drown rats! Xoxoxox

Now it’s time to get our asses handed to us at work…it’s the holidays y’all!!!!

Two Meatballs: Gingerbread Home is Where the Heart is!!!

December 17, 2014health, fitness, beauty, motivation, plus size, make up, hair, hairstylist, oribe, bumble and bumble, MAC Cosmetics, comedy, Paleo, besties, best friends, meatballs, exercise, life change, lifestyles,candy explosions, family christmas taditions, fun with nephews, gingerbread houses, hi kelly, i love my family, so many distractionstwomeatballsgetfit View all 4 comments

Christmas is a really big deal in Apple/Beard land. There are sooooo many traditions that our parents (ie…my mom!!!) created for us that still stand strong today. Christmas is our mom Anna’s favorite time of year and she instilled that love in us and now to Kelly’s kids. I love traditions!!! First, ornaments…they are a huge deal and preferably from Hallmark.

The first pic is of my mom’s tree, the second my sis, the third mine and the last one is my first ornament! My mom, sister and myself all have extensive collections that we LOOOOOOVE!

Second, the following music is acceptable for tree decorating: A Charlie Brown Christmas, The Nutcracker or The Carpenters: Christmas Portrait #shehasthevoiceofanangel

Our stockings are def hung by the fire with care and we open those last…

We watch Santa Clause: The Movie (with Dudley Moore sp!?) every year…

And we make Christmas crafts!!!! This little gem was made for me by my super best buddy Katie and is super relevant to todays post!!!

Mom would have us bring home our milk cartons from school and we would make gingerbread houses with graham crackers!!! Nowadays, the kids and I have started a tradition of making gingerbread houses on a sleepover…I love my nephews #teamwomocha!!! The two years before now were a bit cacamaymeeeee. Year one was Chase’s first attempted sleepover. I bought a kit to build the house but it kept falling apart and became a gingerbread shanty town!

It was sooo fun but so disappointing that it wouldn’t stay together. So last year I felt like a genius bc I was on a strict budget and I found these really cheap pre made gingerbread man cookies…score times a thousand!!! So I bought a bunch of icing and sprinkles and we were soooo excited!

Turns out they were dog treats….hahaha auntie fail!!!! Truth be told, we all tried them and they tasted exactly like you would imagine…delicious!!! jk they were really gross. So this year as I grabbed breakfast at Whole Foods…I saw the most genius thing of life…PRE MADE GINGERBREAD HOUSES!!! No more shanty towns or doggie treats #upgradeya and to top it off, the kids let Kelly come to the sleepover this year! Yay!!! What’s more fun than a sprinkle candy icing fluffanutter explosion in your kitchen!?! The answer is literally nothing!!!

You know I love a before pic! Here are our fun supplies!!!

Lets get started!!! It should be noted that Wyatt and Kelly are the same person and Chasey and I are twinnies. Wyatt and Kelly execute a plan in the smartest way imaginable and have great ideas like the Christmas tree or pooping rat (you’ll see its coming)…Chase and I are controlled by impulse and fun…like a rogue peppermint roof stick (you’ll see its coming)!!! No plan necessary, just glitter and sparkles and rainbows…get ready to 3 and 4 out!!!

Look at all the fun hard work…but don’t think we didn’t get a little distracted here!

Alas…the houses are done!!! Get ready for the after!!!

One fail, one win! Then Kelly and I tried to recreate the win!

Look at this mess…

Ahhhhh….

Just kidding…best night of life!!!

We wrapped the night with couchie snuggles and our very favorite show…Clarence!!! Have you guys seen this show…ugh its the best! #sinksinksink #belsonyouclumsydork

And now we found a Clarence game #obsessed!

#officiallyoverpictures

And no Christmas sleepover is complete without a little game called…can you drag that little mattress to the edge of your bed and cover it with pillow and can we jump on it while you belt out that new Sam Smith song (ok I added the last part but it happened…cause you don’t think I know what you’ve dooooooooone!)

Ugh!!!! Greatest night of life!!! I love my family and Christmas and decorating gingy houses and watching cartoons and everythinggggggg!!!! Here’s to one last crew pic!!! Love y’all!

Two Meatballs: I Decked My Halllllls…And Team Apple Candy Makin’!!!

December 11, 2014health, fitness, beauty, motivation, plus size, make up, hair, hairstylist, oribe, bumble and bumble, MAC Cosmetics, comedy, Paleo, besties, best friends, meatballs, exercise, life change, lifestyles,Candy Making, Christmas time, close your mouth girl, dad broke your painting!, decorating the tree, fa la la la lovvvve christmas, family love, Haystacks, hi kelly, holidays, how do i look sexy?!, I do everything one handed, IKNOWYOUCARE, It's Santa...I know him, Katie, Merry Christmas you filthy animal, paleo recipes, pork tenderloin, Ritz Delights, roasted cabbage, roasted potatoes, sexual cookin, smack it smack it in the air, tacky sweater party, Team Apple, wave your hands side to side put it in the air, whats up girl?!, you catchin flies, you look scared, You're like really prettytwomeatballsgetfit View all 10 comments

You guyyyyysssssss!!! Christmas barfed allllll over my house this weekend!!! This is how I feel about the holidays!!!

If you ask me at any given time what song I’m singing in my head…no matter the time of year it is…”It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas”. I love everything about this time of year…the decorations…the smell of the tree…picking out the tree…looking at all my ornaments…shopping…wrapping…the surprises…making candy with family…Christmas parties…ugly sweaters…sleepovers…Santa…Elf the movie…the music…Mariah Carey’s All I Want for Christmas is You” (but only the first three times)…LITERALLY EVERYTHING.

You will find no happier girl in this world than me in a tree lot…

My partner in crime for the important selection (and help getting it home and up)…JB from DC.

The intoxicating scent took over! #smellismyfavoritesense

We found a winner right off the bat…my tree requirements are tall and fat!!!

Time to get busy!

And then Santa Anna (my adorable mom) met us a the house. She is the ultimate light stringer and Christmases number 1 fan!!!

I love this treeeeeee!!!

Time to get her lit!

And get this house in the spirit!!!

The world makes sense again…my house was MADE for Christmas as evidenced by this photo taken BEFORE I decorated!!!

Thanks mom and dad!!! #lifesavers #everythingismorefuntogether #codependant

Now that the house is ready…what’s a girl to do!? Ohhhh I know, a time honored Apple family tradition…making Christmas Candy!!!!!!! Grandma Apple has been making a combination of Hay Stacks, Ritz Delights, Bullseyes, Chocolate Covered Peanuts and Brickle Bits since me, Kristina and Kelly were little girls…even then I didn’t know when to say no! Bahahaha…

#imliterallygoingtobarf Haystacks are my skittle farting favorites!!! When we got older, the three of us would go to Grandma’s house and help! What a cute team…

Grandma has since retired from the arduous candy makin biz…

but Team Apple as Kelly, Kristina and myself call ourselves (Thanks Nichole LuMaye) decided to revive the tradition and teach a new generation the joy that is…a family cooking segment! Before we get started lets stroll down memory lame…If you are new to the blog or living under a rock, my family is soooo important to me and Kelly and Kristina are 2 of three of the K’s!

And the best for last…

On to the candy making…chanting Team Apple…Team Apple…Team Apple…

I offered to host the cooking segment… one bc I just got all new appliances and two…since we are making the most unpaleo candy, I can make a super healthy and filling paleo lunch for everyone! Before Kristina, Harper and Trace arrived this is how Kelly was sitting and talking to me #whataweirdo #hellofacore

And this was my reaction…

And this is how I feel when I write the blog…

#focussssssss #adultadddddddddddddd But here they are…

#reunitedanditfeelssogood

And the next generation shows up to learn the tricks of the trade…but first the hellos!

Time to get serious…we decided to keep it simple and make haystacks and ritz delights!!! Since they are the least paleo thing on earth I’m going to skip the recipe, but if you’re interested just message me! Time to get cookin good lookin…

bahahahahaha…focus!

First up…Haystacks!!!!

Let the fun begin!!!

So many distractions!!!

Back to biz…

Onto the Ritz Delights…

Yay!!!!

Now it’s time to cool down…

Time to package our little gifts for the Apple Family Christmas Party!

I survived candy making without even one little taste! Time for lunch!!! What’s on the menu?! Roast Pork Tenderloin, Potatoes, Lime Siricha Cabbage…yum!!! My house could not smell better. I got up at 6am to start the slow cooker pork…

Lay a1 1/2lb pork tenderloin on the bottom of the crock pot, add 1 1/2 cups red wine vinegar, 2/3 cup coconut aminos, 1 TBSP each of garlic powder, dry mustard, and rosemary on top of the pork! Cook on low for 6 hours!!! Next Roasted Potatoes…

Ingredients:

2Lbs New Potatoes…I used fingerling

3 Tbsp chopped fresh rosemary

4 cloves garlic minced

3 Tbsp butter (you can use ghee)

1 Tbsp Olive Oil

Sea Salt and Pepper to taste

Ok so take the potatoes, cut them in half lengthwise and put them in a microwave safe container, take a paper towel and wet and wring it out, place on top of potatoes in bowl, put in microwave with a mug of water inside and cook for 2 minutes to “steam” them! Then lay potatoes out on a foil, rimmed baking sheet and put the oven on 400. Mix all the wet and herby ingredients together and coat the potatoes…cook for 2o minutes. I simultaneously roasted this delish cabbage…

Ingredients:

1 firm head of cabbage

2 tbsp of olive oil

2 tbsp fresh squeezed lime juice

2tsp Sriacha

1/2 tsp Sea Salt

2 tsp sesame sauce (i totally forgot about these…sorry kris!)

Cut the cabbage in rounds and then half them (cut the core out of each section instead of initially or you have nothing to hold on to!) 1 inch thick half moons…place onto a rimmed cookie sheet. Mix together all wet ingredients and coat both sides of the cabbage. Place the oven on 450…cook for 15 minutes, take out turn cabbage over and cook for an additional 15 minutes. I mean look at this yummy plate!!!

I love cooking for my family!!!

Ok now lets see how it turned out!

Everything was delish to death…but the cabbage def won my vote for yummiest! Time to clean!

Besssst day ever!!! Grandma Apple it wasn’t the same without you!!! But I have to say Team Apple did you proud girl. Best day of life! Love you guyyyyys to death!!! Dear Christmas, You’re my favorite! Love, Sara

#vintageteamapple #ogcandymakers

Two Meatballs Get Fit

We had so much fun getting fat together. Now we're going to have even more fun getting fit!