Two Meatballs: Adventures in Laser Hair Removal, Cannibalism annnnd Dates Galore!!

Hiiiiiiiiiii you guyyyyyyyys!!!!!  So our format has been a little different lately!  We haven’t been cooking as much.  That segment will return I promise!  But lately Jenny and I have actually been going out when we see each other which has been great and a nice departure!


Orrrrr…when we do hang out its been a LOT of jackassing around lately with Brandon or on breaks at work!



So next week…watch out…we are going to cook our faces off.  But this weekend started off with my 4th session of laser hair removal south of the border…..eeeeek it was the living worst!!!  The laser just keeeeeeps getting hotter! #howisthatpossible  I can’t really take pictures when I’m in there…one  bc I’m super naked not just weigh in naked annnd two bc I’m too busy squeezing a stress ball and yelling terrible things and dying laughing.  SO here is a pic from the waiting room! #trauma


But I survived another round #firecrotch #onlytwomoretogo #itcantgetworsethanthislastone #masochist

You guys know I live for a date! I love spending time with my family and super best buddies and the guy I’m dating #swoon.  So this weekend my sister joined me downtown to meet him and I got to meet some of his friends! This was all facilitated by my call for help Saturday night when my bra got epically stuck in my dryer!!!  My sisters advice was to unhook it #thanksihadnttriedthatyoua-hole but after turning it back on it finally flew out!  I’m in between sizes so this is my only bra #traj That is it hanging down forlornly!


Anywhoozle …I love love love my sister and we nevvvvver get to go out together.  Plus I haven’t been downtown on a Saturday night in 1000 years.  We started out at Poole’s.  They had the yummiest looking cocktails but I got a Diet Coke…in a glass bottle #preshtodeath #vintage


We ended up at Fox Liquor Bar where they proceeded to play Bone Thugs N’ Harmony….like the entire album on repeat at the loudest volume one could imagine. #imtoofuckingold #whendidthathappen But it was suuuupppper fun and again its so nice to be able to play DD!!!  Even though I am admittedly the worst driver of life.  Sunday Jenny and I had a lunch date but we were both so haggard looking no picture of this exists!  Then Monday night the guy and I went to get a new phone as his met an untimely death. #howdoyoulivewithoutaphonethesedays This ended up being a 2 hour ordeal at Verizon…the guy helping us was hilarious! Then we both shopped around for new clothes…look a this adorable tank from Forever 21 #80’smadonna!?


Then we went to dinner at Tazza Kitchen in Cameron Village.  IT WAS SOOOOO GOOOD!


This is his new phone…look how adorable!  He got a drink called the Southern Belle #iveneverlaughedsohard


It ended up looking much more manly than I had thought…And shocker…I had water!

Then we dabbled in cannibalism…this meatball went to town on some delish meatballs!


He knows everyone everywhere we go so the bartender sent over some of the besssst cauliflower known to man…and strawberry chello I don’t know if that is how you spell it but you know what I’m talking about right ladies!?


Then we split crab cakes and the living best broccoli…I don’t know why it was soooo good  but y’alllllll it was sooooooo good!


This place had so many paleo friendly options!!!  I feel like instead of cooking we are giving you guys a tour of where to eat healthy in Raleigh…is that a thing!?


Then it was such a nice night we went to Hibernian downtown and sat on the roof!!!  You gotta love a place that has burnt down twice and just wont die.  The breeze was heaven and the view was even better #winkwink #jk #notreally  Then we watched the living worst movie…Anchorman 2!  Holy shit it was total garbage after the first 30 minutes!!! #chickenofthecaves  Haha…but what a nice way to start a week!



Thennnnnnn last night I went to dinner with my sweet friend Nanner at Coquette and you’re never gonna guess what…i ate steak frites!!!  Anna had the duck…everything was amaze!


After dinner I went to visit my sweet cousin Kristina bc I am having major withdrawals from her not being at work anymore.  In our almost 32 years of friendship I dont think we have ever gone more than 2 weeks without seeing one another so this has been the worst!!!!  But look at how happy this little family is! I also have to say Tim and Kristina have been sooo incredibly supportive  of the Meatballs and are just two of my very favorite people to giggle with on earth!


We had the best time and died laughing at the most inappropriate conversations….gahhhhh I miss them!!!!  #cornchips #eboli #femaleprostate #misterpicklesfarts Oh how I looooove them!  And what an amazing week already!!!!

This coming weekend is my annual hotel sleepover with Wyatt…literally a thousand pictures to follow…another super fun date!!!  I literally cannot wait.  Hope you guys are great and we love you so much!!! #ilovedates


Two Meatballs: Weddings, Weigh ins, Waves and Weally (see what I did there) Big Milestones!!!

Ooooooooo emmmmmmmmm geeeeeeee…I missed you guys sooooo much!!!! Thank you to Jenny for holding down the blog and letting me decompress at the beach! So much happened while I was in paradise with the fam!  First off, Jenny mentioned the wedding that we both attended with my sister last week but I had a few more pics and stories to share!!!  This was one of those happy overlap occasions!  Try to keep up…this is a complicated web I’m going to weave…Jenny is the stylist to the bride Megan and mother of the bride, Susan.  My sister Kelly works for Barry the father of the bride (and my mom’s former boss) and with the mother of the groom Debbie whose son the groom Michael, also works which my Aunt (mom’s sister) Deb is also a part owner and she  brought her husband (my dad’s brother) Uncle Steve. #notincest  Confused yet!?  And we also ran into my childhood bff Amanda’s mom and step dad, Pam and John.  Because of the family connections, I babysat the bride and her brother Brian (a groomsman) once when I was a kid and we watched Mulan 1,000 times. Brian’s girlfriend Kali is also Jenny’s client and did a lovely speech at the wedding. Also the grooms brother Dustin (another groomsman) is married to one of our pals Kirsti….so this wedding was  literally FILLED with familiar and friendly faces!!!


The ceremony was gorgeous and the Megan was STUNNING!!!



The event was at Fearrington Village and after the I do’s there were apps and cocktails….AND A MAGICIAN!!!


I don’t know how he did what he did but we were obsessed…especially Kelly! #magiciansarecoolnotlame

The venue was gorgeous and no detail was missed…


The food was incredible and there were soooo many paleo friendly options!  This was perhaps the first wedding I attended since I was a kid where I didn’t drink…but I was triple fisting water bc it was sooooo hot that my uncle sweat ombre’d his shirt!


So to Megan and Michael…thank you sooo much for having us!  It was such a beautiful wedding!  And thanks for having me as your date Kel! #everythingisbettertogether #fisters



On to the Weally big Milestones:

We hit 400 likes on facebook…


Thennnnn…We hit 20,000 views on the blog…


Aaaaaaaand is if those two things weren’t enough… we got an awesome shout out on Mix 101.5 as well as a facebook blast from the radio personality who promoted us!  Thanks Patrick!!!  Click play below to hear it!!!


I was dead asleep Thursday morning in my comfy, cozy bed at the beach with my super best buddy nephew nugget Wyatt next to me when…


when my phone rang and it was my cousin Tim!!!  He said The Meatballs just got a huge shout out on Mix 101.5…did you know that they were going to do that?!?  In my fog of grizzly bear hibernation sleep my response was WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!? This guy Patrick who works for Mix was inundated by our mutual friends reposting the blog and finally read it and LOVED it…so much so that he said quite possibly the nicest things we could have dreamed of someeone saying about the blog!  So are we on cloud 11 yet!?!?  Big thank you to everyone who reads and reposts our blog and a huge thank you to my cousin Tim for alerting us of this huge, unexpected media plug and my cousin Kristina for sending us a link to hear it for ourselves! We appreciate you guys sooo much!


Now on to the countdown to the WEIGH IN and jumpin in WAVES!!!!

Vacay  with the Beards was a blasssssst!!!!  What idiot schedules their vacation RIGHT before they have to get into bra and panties and WEIGH IN!?!?!  This girl right here.  But you know what…this is a lifestyle change and I have to keep living life while losing weight.  Sooooo, I came to the beach prepared to relax, recharge, have fun, tan war it up aaaaand stay on track!  I brought a blender, food processor (I forgot to pack the blade #useless) and a cooler full of smoothie materials and super paleo friendly food!  I packed my trunk with weight, kettle bells, resistance bands and yoga mats for exercise! If you fail to plan, you plan to fail…am I right ladies?!


I even brought my scale!!!  Bc when you know better you do better…am I right Oprah!?


While at the beach with my favorite people on earth…my awesome family…we typically ate breakfast and lunch in and then dinner out!  There was lots of bacon and eggs happening, some smoothies and for lunch, lettuce boats with tuna or lunch meat.  Snacks usually consisted of fruit and you guyyyys are not even going to believe this but PISTACHIOS!!!! #ineedhelp #itsarealproblem and for drinks…LOTS of water, sparkling water and Kambucha!


The top two were homemade meals of turkey meatballs, tuna boats and squash and onion sautee and blt sweet potato sliders and fried eggs.  The bottom was the best of the worst choices at a typical fried seafood heaven at the beach and the hushpuppies that stared me down during dinner.   Then the kids were tempting me like crazy…the beach=ice cream…


…But I walked away victorious (sang like Biggie’s Notorious).  On one of our last nights together Aunt Debbie made Shrimp Alfredo with caeser salad and garlic bread #paleonightmare #yikesabeez…but she saved me some uncooked shrimp.  I sauteed them with coconut oil and old bay seasoning!  I also boiled some cauliflower and blended that with olive oil and salt and pepper and made my own little paleo shrimp and “grits” on the fly.  I got to really enjoy dinner with my family without straying from my new lifestyle or feeling deprived…bc it was fuggging delishballs!!!


My family as you know is suuuuper supportive and there was always someone around to exercise with and keep myself on track!  They also were soooo great about celebrating all of our good news mentioned above!

On our first morning at the beach mom, dad, Kelly and the kids and myself went down to the beach and did sprints, squats and push ups.  Then mom, Aunt Carole and Wyatt let me be their water aerobics instructor  which was the living funnest!  I’m so lucky to have all this support. My dad and I even had a midnight swim one night after a really big meal!

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This was everyone being active together…Uncle Kelly wins big time!

The pool and beach proved to be  great exercise grounds.  We played volleyball and frisbee. We had handstand contests, did gymnastics, swam, ballet, mountain climbers, more aerobics…the list goes on! Chase and I had a game where he surfed on the boogie board…my arms are still burning!!!


The morning that I would have worked out with Sandra and Jenny…I set my alarm and my dad and i did circuits around the pool.  It was hot and one hell of a workout! We did circuits and then jogged around the pool in between each stations. My dad is the coolest!  He really kept me focused and is always such a fun person to work out with.  Love you soooo much!


And our finisher was running up stairs….wooooof!


I thought I was going to die!  These stairs provided lots of opportunities to exercise or at least feel better about the meal we ate out seeing as how we were on the 4th floor!  Thank you mom, dad, Kelly, Uncle Kelly, Aunt Carole, Aunt Deb, Uncle Steve, Wyatt and Chase for helping me get healthy and showering me with support.  I love you guys sooo much I want to shout it from the roof top!  As far as food and exercise go the beach was a huge success.  I ate more than I should but nothing that I shouldn’t have…baby steps?!  I also stayed strong with the no drinking thing!  #success #bigchanges #ilovemyfamily



So now that I am home, writing this I am about to hop into the shower and pick out a cute pair of undies bc I’m headed to Jenny’s later for our 4TH WEIGH IN!?!?!?!  Can you believe it?  Hopefully her killer workout from last week and my dedication at the beach pay off.  It will be interesting to see how we do when we both had vacation this month!!!  More to come about my super fun vacay and see you tomorrow morning bright and early for the weigh in!!!! Here is a little sneaky peeky boo… xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxox




Two Meatballs: An Ode to the Irreplaceable Krilfistilfina!

I talk a lot about my friends and family…they are my life!  But my cousin Kristina was mos def my first built in friend.  I had the greatest childhood and Kristina is a huge contributing factor to that happiness !!! Look how sweet we were!?!? And Uncle Marty…those shorts…hellllo!


We are only 2 1/2 years apart and we spent soooo much time together that she was always another sister to me…


Another sister that would actually play with me! (yeah I’m talking to you Kelly! xo)


This is us on Christmas morning at our Grandma Apple’s…we spent a ton of time together with our grandparents splashing in puddles during storms, spending countless hours at the library and in the cemeteries, sitting outside of haunted houses, playing in the camper, playing Old Maid and Chutes and Ladders on repeat, going to the Piggly Wiggly and playing at the park across the street.  They even took us to Disney World where we spent more time in the motel pool than in Disney and we created our own language to fit in with the international fans of the park! Look at those fanny packs! #toocoolforschool #shegotgumstuckinhersantradedwithme #peopledontforget #sneakysnake  #sushihead


We also went to Sea World…we didn’t know back then…no judgement!


We put on little plays for our family…


But mostly we just played…for hours on end…


We even Trick or Treated together…

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And around this age there was  just tons of driving around in her car, smoking Newport Mediums…woof and singing Fiona Apple, No Doubt and the Dixie Chicks…and being completely inseparable! We went to 100,000 movies, the zoo, watched Miss America while eating chocolate chip mug cookies (which Kristina invented), forced ourselves to watch every scary movie ever made, had one bazillion sleepovers, beach vacations, riding on the nose of Uncle Al’s boat singing Walking on Sunshine, getting whelps from sitting in Jellyfish poison,  rv-ing in the mountains, seeing outdoor plays, played Family Feud non stop on our ancient computer, she would call me sushi head and I would cry(this was on the way to Disney so I was much younger but it still stings! haha), playing on our bicycle built for two and our super cool crutches, we played every game and put together every puzzle known to man and sooo much more! Like any family relationship/friendship there were def rocky times and lots of games where we hit each other violently but the good times always outweighed the bad and I always knew she had my back and I knew I always had hers.

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We just remained really close and eventually our circles of friends all merged into one.  Kelly and Katie, Kristina and myself were together most weekends….we celebrated recitals, birthdays,  graduations, weddings, babies and just generally enjoyed spending time together.

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Then the most amazing thing happened…we both became hairstylists and ended up both working at Samuel Cole Salon…for the past nine years!  Who is this lucky to get to work with their best friend cousin sister Kri Kri K-Dog X-Tina five days a week…every week!?!?  Working together has afforded us so many opportunities that we got to share together.  We have trapesed all over NYC together taking the best classes at the House of Bumble, going to Broadway shows, MOMA, eating at some of the best restaurants, performed Thai Chi in Times Square, created a living art instillation,  almost got murdered at the Hotel Chelsea #rapeportal #theshiningmeetscsi,  and stalking…I mean bumping into Rihanna at the W #thereisnophotobcwereidiots!

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We’ve been through promotions and title changes, countless Bobbies, Grand Re-openings, salon moves and newer Grand Openings, awards, she was even my model for an editorial submission…but most importantly we just got to spend time together!  When Kris first came to work at Samuel Cole, I was so excited I found myself hugging her everyday…no shocker for me right Melinda,  but for those who don’t know my cuz that well…hugging is not her jam.  She had to impose a once a week hug mandate on me…bahahahahahaha! I tried but failed!

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Kristina has the most contagious laugh…she literally cries she laughs so hard, she has unbridled joy for cookies, she so fucking smart and I believe she could perform surgery just through sheer will and determination, she is the best mom and an awesome sounding board with great advice.  Those are the things I’ll miss the most…because my sweet friend  after having her third child has decided to stay home with her  kids.  I love hate this decision soooo much.  But I couldn’t be happier for her and I will just have to trek it out to Wake Forest a little more often…to see her…and her fun kids…and her husband Tim whom I adore #winwinwin!!!  So, to Kristina…I have cried at least three times writing this.  I feel so lucky that we are sooo close and have all this amazing history together. I love you to the moon and back and then back to the moon again.  So many of my fondest memories involve you and I wouldn’t want it any other way.  You are the reason I went to hair school and I just couldn’t thank you enough.  I’m so glad that we get to be a part of each others lives forever.  Love you cuzzy wuzzy.


Ps if you are wondering about the title…Our Grandma Apple made up her own pig latin and that is how you say Kristina…Krilfistilfina…Mine is Sarlfara.   Get it..nope we don’t either but we can all speak it fluently somehow! I LOVE YOU KRIS! #bffffffffffffffs #bestcousins #luckytimesinfinity