bliss body yoga

Two Meatballs: Ace is the Place…to Work in High School and Make Friends for Life!!!

You guyyys!!!  Hope your weekend was everything, I know mine was!!!  I kicked off the weekend with my super best boss mentor buddies #likeaboss  They joined me at Bliss Body for a little Restorative Yoga!!!


I finally got to meet the other Beginners teacher, Kristen and she was an adorable little sprite!


This will be my new Friday ritual…what a great way to let go of the week and start the weekend off right!?!  See you next week Kristen!  Then Jack, Joelle and I had dinner at Guasaca and bathed in the bliss that is adult nap time.  I just love these two.  Going to such a spiritual class with two people who have helped you grow up and whom you love and respect is something I am very grateful for. Xoxo Rays!

Then, Remember my old pal Elizabeth???  We grew up in the same neighborhood and became super best buddies in 2nd grade.  I spent the night at her house every Friday night in elementary school and we played Barbies like it was our full time job!!!  I swear I have pictures of us as kids but I can’t for the life of my find them…this is the closest I is Elizabeth’s butt at my 8th birthday party!


We stayed close even though we went to different middle schools and then reunited in high school!


We even worked together as cashiers at Miller’s Ace Hardware!


We made so many amazing friends here (Hi Katie, Annie, Missy, Mark, Phil, Ryan, Katie B, Kristine, Carlos, Scott, and everyone else…and Ace and high school is where we met Natalie!


We hung out allllllll the time…mostly at Mark’s house!


For years these were the people I saw every single day and all weekend long!  But eventually the store closed down, we all found different jobs, went to college, moved away, got married and now keep in touch on Facebook.  While I was on vacation, Elizabeth asked if I wanted to be her date to Natalie’s wedding in Winterville!  I was so excited!!!  It is so hard as adults to make the planets align and really get to hang out with the people you love when you no longer conveniently work together!!!  So, Elizabeth picked me up on Saturday and we trekked it out to the farmiest of places.  It was so great to catch up!!!


We made it just in the nick of time…they were literally walking down the aisle as we walked in…


Chris and Natalie are adorable and they have a little girl named Phoebe who was having none of this wedding bullshit!!!  She was falling apart in the sweetest way!


Her wanted none of it.  The ceremony was short and oh so sweet!


Lots of laughter and talking and cute faces.

Natalie hasn’t changed a bit!!!  She was wearing Rainbows and the most beautiful hippie dress.  These two clearly adore each other! Look at that kiss! #hubbahubba #ishouldbeaphotographer


And once it was all said and done, Phoebe even came around to the excitement!


They had the wedding in a friend’s backyard and it was gorgeous and really intimate!


Twinkle lights and mason jars…heaven!!!  We also got to see Natalie’s mom, who I haven’t see in forever! #loveyoujackie #kissesforeveryone


Catching up was the best.  I love when some things never change.  Congrats you two!


Thank you so much for having us!!!  Natalie I am so glad I got to be there for your special day and to see your sweet face.  Thank you for always supporting the blog…even from afar!  Love you so much… and Elizabeth thanks for letting me be your plus one!!!!


Friends for life is the way to go!  #letsdothismoreoften Let’s have an ACE reunion you guys!!!!

Then, Sunday morning I found my way to the mat and the love of my life…Meg!!!  I am always glad to find myself coming back to this place…there is always a message that I need.  And don’t forget the yoga burrito!


I came back later for one more dose of Restorative with Kristina.  I love ending my weekend the way it began.  With peace, patience and love for myself and others.  Thank you to my Bliss Body family.  I love you all and cheers to old friends and new ones!


Two Meatballs: Splurge!!!! You Deserve It ;)

As you heard from me last week, I will not be defined by a number.  I love the momentum that Jenny and I have created for ourselves lately.  I am feeling so proud of this progress that I want to celebrate.  My refinance went through this week and I shaved off a project from my renovation list so that I could splurge on some smaller sized fall wardrobe pieces…



A new workout outfit…


My dream rain boots and a bag that I’ve been eyeing FOREVER courtesy of our newMarket at  Colonnade neighbor, Dress! (I didn’t totally splurge, this is a consignment piece!)


It feels so nice to buy myself things that I need and to be able to let loose a little.  So no 3rd bedroom turned into a closet, but yes to a revamp for my master bedroom closet…a great swap!  Another way I’m choosing to celebrate is by treating myself to a class at Durham Yoga Company


with my yoga heroes Jessamyn Stanley and Dana Falsetti!!!


I could not wait to be in the same room as these women!!! I mean, somebody like at them!!!


I love powerful, brave women and I can’t wait to soak in every lesson they have to share.  Their message is that yoga is for everyBODY!!!!  I love the idea that one day, with lots of practice, I can work on getting into (and out of haha #pigeonfail #fuckbirds) any one of these poses.  Plus I love their distinct styles!!!!  I am so excited to be going on this adventure with my client and friend, Gabi!!!! You guys, this class was everything!!!  We got there super early bc we both have that unsettling fear of new things; where will we park, what if we get lost, what if we are late!?  This only gave us lots of time to talk and meet new friends!


When I saw Dana and Jessamyn walking towards us, I felt very fan girl!  They greeted us warmly and we went inside to wait for the previous class to end!


And then it was time.  There were only 6 people in class so it was super intimate and just so fucking amazing.  It was everything that I dreamed of and more.  You know me, I asked for a picture right away and Jessamyn kindly obliged!


Look at those yoga pants…jelly as helly!  Then we jumped right in.  They both talked a lot about how sometimes the hardest part about yoga is just getting yourself to the mat.  Then we did wrist exercises like crazy bc little did we know we were going to hit down dog, high plank, chatarunga, up dog over and over and over and over again.  It was great to watch someone in yoga pants and a sports bra do these poses bc you could really see what they meant.  My alignment and body position changed immediately and ultimately made everything, especially my plank 100 times easier.  This was so challenging, it was just as much mental as it was physical.  I for sure got to a point where I thought, there is no fucking way I can do down dog again!!!  But we finally moved on to half moons and warriors and attempted crow on my part haha.  I was pouring sweat.  But it was so fun and just so damn inspiring.  These women are incredible…like every woman I have met on this yoga journey!  All of the sudden, two hours were up, my arms were shaking but I didn’t want to end.  I felt so much closer to Gabi, we have decided to do something fun and challenging once a month since we made such a great team!  #nosharktanksipromise By this time I had made my blogging wants and needs known and everyone totally obliged for the funnest picture sesh!


It is so bonding to sweat and learn with people in this intimate of a setting.  Plus I just love when people are onboard…look at this fun bunch of nuts! #mypeople  And the fun didn’t stop there.


Look how sweaty and in love!  I wanted to be a part of the skins team! #noshirtsneeded


And then we got crazy!


Look at them!!!


Look at us! Hahahahahah!  Sooooo fun!


Gabi!!! Thank you so much for coming with me!!!  I love you so much!  Jessamyn and Dana, I feel so lucky that I got the chance to practice with y’all.  You guys are amazing and I loved every single second of this time together.  I literally can’t wait to do it again. Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo Ps, lets be friends forever!

The next morning my mom and I started Nancy’s Beginners Series at Bliss Body!!!


I thought it would be a breeze considering it was my second go round, silly bird!  It was so fun seeing familiar faces, two of my fellow graduates decided to retake the series!!!  And then my client/bestie Carol and her mom decided to come as well!  This class was packed and I found a whole new family to love.  Mom, this time together means so much to me!!!  Can’t wait for Saturday! Love you.

What wonderful ways to celebrate a healthier me.  Now, time to stop spending money since my renovation starts the first week of November…more things to be excited about and grateful for.  I love all of you and always remember to treat yo’ self!!!!


Two Meatballs: Math is Hard!!!

I don’t want to make you guys barf or insert side eye/intense eye roll….but I’m just so happy!  Sara here and I just want to say, it’s always easier to focus on what isn’t going well, what is a struggle, what we wish was different since we are such a goal oriented society that is discouraged from sharing their true feelings, but sometimes we forget to say when things are just going swimmingly!  This has been a really tough year, but it is turning out to be the best year I’ve ever had!  In the spirit of positivity, let’s cheers to the good times.  So here goes…I want to celebrate that I have made huge changes in my life and that my life is joyfully responding.  It feels so nice to not be devastatingly sick.  It feels amazing to be dealing with my past so it doesn’t keep creeping into my present and future.  It is nice to feel and embrace all the feels…even the ones that make me uncomfortably vulnerable.  It feels stupendous to complete things I signed up for. Trying new things makes me tingly.  It feels kind to really listen to my body.  And it feels so warm to bathe in empathy and unconditional love and connect with everyone on a deeper level.  I feel so good that I fee like I’m literally glowing. #stopit #noreally I know that obstacles will creep their way back in but I feel better equipped to recognize the decline and tap into my healthier coping mechanisms.  I’m not poisoning my body with foods that I am sensitive to.  I’m not poisoning my mind but judging myself and beating myself up for the missteps.  I’m not poisoning my body by running it into the ground.  I have changed.  Jenny and I have made such huge changes!  As you read yesterday, my meatball and I went to yoga at Bliss Body last night…


And as yoga always does, it sparked a really great conversation between us.  We are both so much more open than we were a year ago.  In March, we are coming up on 2 years of the journey to health together and we have changed, evolved and thankfully grown together. #loveyoujenny  Here is where we started!


Big, boozy, reckless babes.  We both thought that we had it alllll figured out.  But the gift is accepting that you can always learn more.  Here is a run down of our weigh ins thus far…



We were at our smallest on the stairs with the front and back view!!!  Then we both really started gaining weight back and slowly realizing that we were moving further from our goals and that this was about to become so much more than paleo.  We always know we are doing well when we want to post our #ootd or Outfit of the Day!


This was both of our teeniests!  And we love a before and after!  I mean somebody look at these!


We really fell off of doing these around February.  We both just weren’t in it anymore and just couldn’t seem to find our way out of the darkness.  And by the time Nikki’s shower rolled around, I had hit 300 and beyond again.


To go from 340 to 255 to 306 felt so discouraging and like I had really failed.  Thank gah for therapy, yoga and health care professionals and a burning desire to change. I had to accept that what I had been doing, might not be sustainable.

So, now that we have both done some serious soul searching we both know that ultimately nothing has changed about where we want to go.  We both want to be healthy and to keep evolving into better versions of ourselves…and we want to do it together.  So we had to find new ways to keep it interesting and to keep getting real with ourselves.  Like for instance that as good as Edible Art cupcakes are, they probably definitely aren’t a positive contributor to our lives/addictions/end game.  And you know what, amazingly enough, we started eating healthy, putting ourselves first, exercising and exploring all the areas that make you healthy and ultimately wanting to do #ootd’s again and before and afters.


I haven’t weighed myself since we decided to take a break from weigh ins.  I am really trying to get healthy and I had a very unhealthy obsession with my made up math of weight loss.  It feels very freeing to not have the constant literal and figurative ups and downs thrown in my face every morning.  I can’t lie, of course I’m curious…and that is what brings me to a little segment called…So, Weigh in is Coming Up.

So, weigh in is coming up in the beginning of November.  We used to do a weigh in shoot every single month to post our progress.  When I got very sick again and had to got to the hospital, we decided to postpone our weigh in and start doing it quarterly.  We both desperately needed a break and we wanted to have some real time to actually see progress since our numbers had been moving in the wrong direction for awhile.  And wouldn’t you know it, November is just weeks away.  How does it fly by so fast?!  I am really at a crossroads here.  My obsessive compulsions with my weight have really been silenced by not stepping on the scale.  It has allowed me to really focus on my physical health instead of my actual weight.  I have some major trepidations about weighing myself.  I worry that I will fall into that rabbit hole of obsession once again and possibly sacrifice some of the amazing progress I have made chasing that dragon of a minus on my chalk board.  What if I feel this good but my weight isn’t where I think it is in my head.  What if I start defining who I am and what I am worth by a number again.  What if this spirals back into a relapse  and I start gaining weight again. #lifeofa4 And then the clouds part and I see the light.  I don’t have to be shackled by fear, worries or what ifs.  I can measure myself and my progress in any manner that I see fit.  As this post began, there are so many things to celebrate and Jenny and I have no reason to be anything but proud and accepting of our resiliency in the face of great obstacles.  We created this blog to help ourselves and others and we get call the shots.  I am not going to let a number send me off the cliff. I am not a number and I won’t let a number define me. We are striving for progress not perfection and we had both been working so hard…why not continue to share the ENTIRE journey with everyone.  This is hard, and that just means it will be worth it.  As long winded as this was, I will close with, we will see you at the weigh in, chalk boards in hand, feeling brave and empowered.  Sending you all my love. Xoxo,



Two Meatballs: Nohm You Didn’t!? Ohm Yes I Did!!!!!!!

Yogayyyyyyys!  8 weeks ago, I signed up for the beginners series at Bliss Body Yoga…


and this past Saturday was graduation!!!!  I made it. We Made IT!


I made it to every single class and even got inspired to try new classes and start a new challenge of 20 classes in 31 days! I love these gold stars!


So many things about this make me feel great. #1 I signed up for something different. #2 I started this by myself, way out of my comfort zone #codependent


#3 I really pushed myself #4 I completed the series!!!! #5 I found a spiritual home


#6 I found another community that has whole heartedly accepted me and that I love #7 I have fallen in love with every instructor I’ve had


#8 I’ve met amazing new friends #9 I LOVE YOGA #I have found peace, contentment, breath, honesty, forgiveness, light, love, acceptance, calm, energy, truth, beauty, and how to really be present!


#10 I have found a new way to spend time with the people that I love!


I just feel such a huge sense of accomplishment and also a calling to tell everyone how life changing yoga is!!!  It’s all I talk about and I just want to experience it with everyone together!  My mom and I are starting the beginners series this coming Saturday and I can’t wait to have this time with her.  It has been everything for me and my sister, so I just can’t wait!!!  Nancy, I feel like the universe brought us together and I’m so thankful that I ended up in your class at Bliss Body.I knew from the moment I met you that we were going to kindred spirits #anneofgreengables  I think you are such a wonderful person and your light shines so bright.  I couldn’t be more happy to be starting this series again with you!!!  Here is a little trip down memory lane…


Thank you to Meg, Barbara, Rachel and Kristina for welcoming me into your classes as well! I can’t wait to meet EVERYONE!  So as part of my challenge I found myself at Bliss Body all damn day today and it was heaven!  I started the day with Flow Yoga Basics with sweet Meg!  This was hard but blissful!  So blissful in fact that for the first time EVER I forgot to get a pic! Dammit!  I met my family for lunch #ogbeards at Guacasa and it was great.  I literally felt high from class.  We talked a lot about   just because you may have a misstep doesn’t meant that you have to start from the beginning, you can start right from where you stand, forgiveness of ones self!  Then I met Kelly and my good ol Pure Barre buddy, Lauren for a Sunday Funday, welcome to Barbaras Restorative Yoga…


I cannot say enough about how lovely this class is.  You just melt into the floor and the only thing you need to do it breath…heaven!  She asked us to listen in the silence to what pops up and for me it was a calling to do more.  I have so much and I want to give back more!!!  Here is a perfect opportunity!


Please give if you can, If you have something that you would like to donate I can bring it to the studio for you, or you can come take a class with me winky face!

And I love sharing this restoration with my friends!!!  Then Kelly was signed up for Flow Yoga right after this nap and I decided to face my fears, be brave and try my first full blown, fast paced flow class…and I survived!!!  Thanks Kristina for being gentle with me!!!!  Kristina’s class was all about your 5th chakra which is your throat, your voice, your truth and creating space and length in the neck!


Kellllllly, thanks for always being so supportive!  You guys, it was like sweat pouring off of you hard, buuuut I totally held my own and only had to come out of the poses a handful of times.  It is amazing how much of a difference 8 weeks and the loving embrace of a new yoga studio can make!!!  Are you guys on board yet, have you signed up to get to know yourself and the rest of the word better!?!?!?!?!  In closing, I have officially done my first 3 a day workout, I am a Beginners Series Graduate ( a thank you very much), I survived my first flow class and I am closer to my self and everyone that I’ve had the pleasure of practicing this wonderful gift with.


Look at the difference!!!  If anyone wants to come to a class with me, I WOULD LOVE THAT! Just message me and lets get our bliss on.  I literally love every single one of you and I am grateful everyday that you read our journey.  Through all of the ups and downs of me and Jenny trying to get healthy, you guys have been the one thing that has never changed, and we love you for that.  From my light to yours, namaste.


Two Meatballs: Rain Rain GO AWAY!!!

In my former life, I didn’t like to do anything when it rained, so I didn’t!  But whats a gal to do when it rained 5 out of 7 days of vacation and then 8 more days straight when she got home!?   I am solar powered so this weather has gotten really depressing.  And this pressure in the air is a perfect storm (Get it) for my migraines.  And guess what, your calendar doesn’t just shut down because a hurricane is coming!


Hahahahaha!!!  Lesson to be learned, life goes on.  The rain does wonders for the world.  It helps plants grow, it keeps us all hydrated, it offers so many cute fashion opportunities like rain boots and cute rain slickers and so much more…trying so hard to find the silver lining!!!  Guess it is time to embrace an umbrella and to wear my hair off my face.  Here are all the things I did that I wanted to cancel because of the rain!  I went to Pure Barre and Bliss Body Yoga on Saturday while it was raining sideways!  Yeah thats right, I did another 2 a day!


Then I stopped by my parents and then my sisters to see her and the kids!


They showed me all the fun games they created by dragging Chases’s mattress into the living room.  Then it was story time.  The kids love to go in a circle and tell stories…they can be true or made up or about dreams or scary things.


Wyatt always instigates story time.  #likeaboss  And somebody look at Chase…


He is an old soul at 5!  We had so much fun and then got showered up and went to dinner.  This was clearly supposed to be an adult only dinner and we somehow tagged along…but where quarantined in our own booth…fun was had none the less!  We tried Nantucket Grill and it was alright.  The company and magician made it great!  This is segment called the adults table:


aka, the people intended to be at this dinner…this is a segment called, the kids table…aka what are we doing here haha!


Then a magician came by and all hell broke loose!

Now watch as Wayne blows Wyatt’s mind!


He was freaking out…now Chase’s turn!


Somebody look at these faces!!!


I could have watched this all night…and we did!


Love my family!


Even if I’m 32 and still at the kids table!

I am glad that I went, even in the rain!  Then the next day I cancelled my pb class, slept in and then got ready for my cousin Eric’s wedding!


I drove with Kelly and the kids, so much fun!  And look at what a cute little family!

Wyatt did a great job of taking our pic!  We explored all around and me and Chase even caught a glimpse of Eric before the nuptials!  Then we found our seats and had some fun before the big event!


This segment is called How many pics does it take to get everyone on the same page!? #ogbeards


We made it through 6 before we got these three winners!


#sideeye #dadisalwaystalking #theboysfaces

Then the wedding began!


Leeann, Clyde and Anna walked down the aisle!


Eric’s best friend officiated the ceremony!  And here comes the bride!


This was one of the sweetest weddings I have ever been to!  Eric teared up as soon as he saw Gia.  It always gets me choked up!  This was the kids first wedding and it was so sweet to experience it together.  Look how happy these two are!


Congrats to the happy couple!  They had postcards on the table for well wishes and advice and both the boys wanted to write something.  Then we went on a mission to find the couple and hand deliver our messages.  Wyatt was so nervous.  He know Eric is a gamer and I think he felt like he was a celebrity…it was adorable.  I will always think of Eric as the child shirtless wonder.  This kid never had a shirt on growing up!!!  I love this family so much and as always it was so great to be together.  Love you all and welcome to the family Gia!  The rain for sure did not put a damper on this weekend!

Two Meatballs: Relax, Relate, Release…Restore

As you read, my vacation was everything.  I have set my intentions to be peaceful, open, loving and centered and I truly felt that while at the beach.  I typically feel a little drained when I get home from vacations.  But because of the rain and where I am in my life right now, it really forced lots of quiet, reflective time.  I also really felt like I let the ocean wash my grief away.  I had lots of happy memories of Gigi while on vacay.  Little things seemed to pop up everywhere I went that reminded me of her and made me feel like she was still with us. This was us last year at the same time!


We happily talked about her a lot.

Writing that letter really helped me process my unknown unresolved feelings connected to her passing.  I feel like the loneliness and anger have moved along and were washed out with the tide which feels so peaceful. I ended vacation the same way that I started.  I came home early to go to Class 6 of Beginners yoga with my sister Kelly.  This was great on several levels.  While one vacation I really wanted to relax so I didn’t work out. Coming home to yoga got me back into moving my body.  Also, I had been missing my sister like crazy sooooo I literally couldn’t wait to see her.  Kelly, can i just saw how grateful I am that we are doing this together?!  I didn’t know that we could be get any closer but I really appreciate this time we get to spend together.  I really love you and I didn’t realize how much I was missing being with you, beyond just being gone for vacation. #sohappytogether #gettingevencloser #sharedactivites #cohabitation #whatdopeoplewiithoutsistersdo!?


Nancy was in training this day and Meg was our instructor for the day!


We connected right away.  I asked her if she was into taking a picture and she said sure, which one us is going to do the headstand and which one of us is going to do the split! Hahahahaha, love her.  If you’ve never taken yoga, I can’t tell you enough how life changing has been for me.  First of all I want to thank my client Catrina (who you’ll remember from our Pure Barre date)


for introducing me to Bliss Body Yoga.  I had told her I wanted to get into yoga and she told me about their beginners series and the rest is history!  I honestly cannot thank you enough, can’t wait to see you soon!!!  XOXO

I have really been searching for more spirituality in life and a deeper connection with myself and others.  Every class, you are simply practicing.  Every class is a gift.  And to get to do it with my sister makes me feel even more connected to her.  When your instructor talks, it always feels like she is talking directly to you.  Whatever the lesson, it feels so relevant to everything that is going on in your life.  Meg talked a lot about the juxtaposition of yoga.  How you have to have the foundation to  have the freedom.  How you have the flexibility and the control.  Balance.  The class  was amazing, as always.  We focused on bridges into shoulder stands.  I can’t do a shoulder stand yet but what I love about yoga is that I get to find my own way there.  I get to keep practicing.  There is no expectation, no judgment.  We are all learning together.  They show you the full range of a pose.  It is inspiring and exciting to think of what I’ll be able to do in a year!  I already feel stronger.  I love the control of the poses, the breath used to expand and contract.  I could go on forever about this.  Kelly and I went to lunch at Guasaca (the living best place on Earth)


afterwards and just talked about our life goals and they were very similar.  Ultimately we both want to strive for peace because we feel like everything will fall into place from there.  I took a nap when I got home and did some laundry, but kept the relaxing, reflective time going.  Then Sunday morning I woke up for a Pure Barre class with the amazing and Raleigh famous Maureen!


Everyone I know, knows this woman and what a pleasure it is to know her.  She is Nikki’s client at Samuel Cole and she has read our journey and been a supporter long before I came to Barre.  She always has a kind word and tells everyone to read our blog.  She is just as supportive in class.  She always tells me I’m doing a good job even when I can clearly see that I am in no way shape or form doing what everyone else is doing.  I understand my own limitations so much better now.  I don’t need to compete, I just need to show up and keep striving to get better.  One day I will be able to table top my legs.  One day I will be able to keep both legs in the air and my head and shoulders lifted.  But I’m going to be patient and just keep at it.  I mean look at how sweaty I am.  I love this place, this workout and Maureen so much.  There are a lot of yoga elements in Pure Barre.  We do cat, cow, locust, cobra and lots of other stretching throughout this challenging workout.  It felt great to be back and this was Class 5 out of the Back To Barre 10 Challenge. Almost there!  Then I went grocery shopping and Targeting.  I came home, threw tomorrows meal in a crock pot, cleaned and unpacked then met my sister for Restorative Yoga with Barbara from Bliss Body Yoga.  Who am I…2 a days!?!  Yogaaaaays…this class with a body melt.  Talk about relaxation.  This class is the living embodiment of peace and balance.  You do 4 or 5 assisted, supported poses.  You set yourself up with blocks, blankets, bolsters (oh my) and find a comfortable way to support yourself through a single pose that you hold for 10 minutes. The focus was heavy on the breathing and sending light into your heart.  It was like adult nap time.  Yesterday Meg said people either love savasana or they hate it.  It is a lot of quiet time alone in your head and in your body!  Well, I am in the love camp.  #duh Restorative Yoga was like an hour and 15 minutes of savasana.  This really didn’t feel like heart pumping exercise (because it wasn’t at all), it felt like a calm gift. Our instructor introduced the idea of this kind of restoration as a necessity instead of a luxury.  #imonboard  We did a side pose and had the bolster behind our back.  She said what does it feel like to have your own back. It was very empowering.  I felt the expanse of my breath and I felt so in control and so connected to everyone in this small space and everyone in the world.  It’s that juxtaposition again.  The universe is inside of you, you are yoga.  Yet you are a small being inside of the vast universe and we are all connected.  This will be a part of my life for the rest of my life.  I am hooked on the way yoga makes me feel.  I love feeling like the possibilities are endless and that it will always just be something I practice no matter what my skill level becomes.  Thank you Kelly for wanting to go today.  I love trying new things with you.  It feels amazing to get to know ourselves better together.


Since I am finally listening to myself and the universe and finding way to replenish my depleted body, heart and mind, I now have the energy to do the other things that need to get done!  I came home, finished cleaning and unpacking and cooked up a storm.  I spent Sunday getting back into the swing of life and didn’t once feel overwhelmed.


Then on Tuesday, the living best thing happened, my Meatball joined me and Kelly for A Flow Basics class!!!!!  Jenny and I have been really disconnected lately, mostly because of my vacation, but we needed some quality time.  She came over Monday night after I went to Pure Barre and she went to Body Pump.  We really have changed.  No matter what is going on, we keep finding our way back to exercise and each other.


We snuggled on the couch and talked a lot about the future and being present and I told her I was going to join the yoga challenge at my studio!


She said she would love to take a class and it happened the next day…I mean somebody look at all these trees!?!


What a fun way to be together and to do something nice for yourself.  So many of my favorite people in one pic!  Then Jenny and I went and had a healthy dinner date…


And just kept this lovely flow and exchange of ideas going.  We ended up talking half the night.  WE are both in such good places right now and so open to change…to thinking of things in a different way.  So glad you came tonight and so glad to be on this ever evolving journey of self acceptance and health with you Jenny. XO

Lifestyle changes are really something.  Getting things done and being prepared to eat healthy and scheduling ways to keep my body moving have now become so easy since I’ve learned how to really take care of myself.  If you are struggling to lose weight, just know that you have to start with actually getting healthy on all levels; your mind, your heart, your soul and then your body will fall into place.  This will always be more than calorie counting and bootcamps.  But it is possible and it will always be a jounery of ups and downs. We have your back while you try to find out how to have your own. Namaste.


Two Meatballs: My Tumultuous Relationship…With Exercise

Besides food and men and everything else, exercise is a total roller coaster/glass case of emotion of a relationship for me. Until I saw the light, this is how I felt about people who were itty bitty with no effort!


After years of hoping and wishing and thinking and praying (#didyouseewhatIdidthere?!) that I would also somehow become one of those girls, I finally succumbed to the fact that effortless weight loss wasn’t going to happen for me, however even with this new found acceptance,  for years this is how I felt about exercise and people who looooooved it!


This baby looks EXACTLY like my grandpa Apple by the by!  I just didn’t understand the appeal.  I certainly didn’t trust the people who talked about getting up at 5 every morning to go to bootcamp, or had to miss going out for drinks because they had a Body Pump class after work!? And don’t EVEN get me started about your friends wanting to tell every detail of their killer workout…


I was already sweating from simply existing in my 356 pound  5’4 body…why on earth would I want to do anything more strenuous than just sitting…or partying, isn’t that a workout?!


I mean, that is a squat and a curl as far as I’m concerned!

As social media and Pinterest really started taking off and I saw everyones training schedules and motivational workouts, Couch to 5k challenges and how to workout just using your own body…I felt like this would be a better plan for me.


And for years it was.  When I was 24 my bestie Katie and I joined a gym, got a trainer and got serious about getting skinny.  We would workout so hard during the week and eat so good, whatever fad diet or calorie restrictor, low fat craze was happening we were all about it and  for us it was Smash the Fat and it was really working.  Then we would go get hammered every single weekend and eat whatever we wanted.  The idea of a lifestyle change wasn’t really in our plan and ultimately, after losing 70 pounds I said later girlllll to the gym….annnnd Smash the Fat.  Before that I had dabble with Curves, I even saw another trainer for awhile.  I joined my dads gym that was close to his work, but it was crazy inconvenient.  Nothing ever really stuck and I would always just get very stuck in a routine that would end up totally boring me.  It is fair to say that moving my body was NOT a priority and I gained back all the weight plus so much more.  This was my idea of fitness and nutrition after I said fuck it.


But you guyyyyyyyys!!!!  (this is Sara btwwwwwww’s)  Everything has changed. I really understand that lifestyle change concept now and  I wouldn’t say that I love working out, but that’s ok!  Like any relationship, there are ups and downs, but me and working out see eye to eye a lot more now.  I don’t have to love it every time, simply have to go!!! And honestly,  I do really love the way it makes me feel. Even when I struggle with food, working out and moving my body has become the constant, the stable relationship if you.   Also, I’ve learned what makes me happy and motivated to workout. 1. I love group fitness, I want the community experience, you know I love a team.  2. I love being told what to do (this is the only time I like being told what to do!!!) I show up, listen, do and it’s over!  3. I love not having to wear shoes…Pure Barre I get wear these adorable socks…


And in yoga I get to free ball!!!


I literally feel so free!!!  And between Sandra, Pure Barre and Bliss Body, I’m getting all my happy/healthy needs met #healthyrelationship!  With Sandy it’s my one guaranteed workout with my best friend and I get at least one really high intensity workout a week which is always different! This week was nutty! Slam balls planks and rowing! Oh my!!! #sarathatbuttistoohigh


With Pure Barre, I get a lower impact workout that really focuses on core and small, controlled movments, the music is loud and its just so different…plus no shoes and a great community!


And with Yoga, I have found a new level of connectedness with myself and those around me…


And this week I got all three in.  Since I don’t drink anymore and I can eat exactly nothing right now, which knocks out going out to eat (although I did make it out to Kristi’s bachelorette party this weekend!!! So fun, congrats Kessie!!!


So great to see everyone outside of work)

…workouts have become my new hang out!  I mean somebody look at all the fun we’re having!


Kelly came to yoga with me, I met the whole damn fam at the gym and me and Laur went to PB!!! And you’re not even going to believe what else…I have joined a challenge!!!  Who am I!?  Pure Barre is challenging everyone to do 10, 20 or 30 classes in September


and as of right now, I have crossed off 4 out of 10 classes…wahoo!!!


I have become the person I used to mistrust.  I am blogging about fitness, taking part in physical challenges, getting up at 5am for classes and boring people (my dad) with every gory detail of my workouts.  And you know what, it feels famazing and so do I.  If you ever question whether you can do something or not, just know that you absolutely can, you just have to get started and find what you love.  If this girl whose old motto was this…


and who still feels like this…


Can do this…


You can do anything!


Find your fitness home and make yourself a priority.  This has become a great healthy relationship for me and I know it can for you. Xo

Two Meatballs: Om My Gah Yogaaaaaays!

Well hello everyone!!!  This is your pal Sara and I have to say, I am feeling better than I have in a really long time.  I’m eating healthy and moving my body again.  My mind feels calmer.  I feel present and inside of my own body instead of my own head.  I feel powerful and calm and excited to moved forward with all the things I’m learning in therapy and all my other endeavors!  In the spirit of change and new beginnings, this weekend started my Yoga Beginners Series at Bliss Body Yoga…you’re not even going to believe this!!!  I loooooooooooooooooved it.  It was everything.  What an enlightening experience.  I had such a calm feeling driving there.  Not many things make me nervous, but doing new group exercise things are usually a nail biter for me.  But the night before I fell right to sleep, woke up on time, got dressed, had a green tea and headed out.  My drive there was so peaceful, windows down and I wasn’t nervous…like at all!!!!  I pulled up, walked in and was greeted by our instructor, Nancy, the cutest cutie. This place is gorgeous.


A tiny voice in my head said , pick a spot in the back.  But I’m a front row girl, so I shook that thought away and sat front and center next to my new friend Jo!


By the time 11:15 rolled around, the room was comfortably full.  Nancy welcomed us, introduced herself and told us a little about her.  Then we went around the room and said our name, what our previous yoga experience was and what we would like to gain from class.  It was so nice to feel a sense of community before we got started and by the end of intros it was clear that everyone was kind of on the same page…wanting to learn the basics so as not to feel so lost, gain strength, flexibility and relief from our stressful lives.  We started with Savasana or corpse pose, which lets you focus on breathing.  It was like a peaceful nap.  Then we slowly progressed into a series called  Surya Namaskar or Sun Salutation which included table to cat to cow to childs pose.  We went over lots of body posture points and ways to modify as your body gets used to the stretch.  Then we went over how to distribute weight in your hands and feet for downward dog!


Then we walked to the front of our mat and did a very powerful stance. Hinged at the waist, into downward dog, then into a plank to cobra to downward dog I think, then back to standing and hands to heart.  It was a lot of information but it felt nice and I loved the repetition of it.  To finish up we did Savasana one more time and she came by and misted a lovely smelling mixture over us.   Before you knew it an hour and fifteen minutes had flown by.  I ran into one of Kelsey and Alleys clients before we left…such a small world!!!  I have to say, I absolutely loved this.  I love Nancy, I loved Bliss Body Yoga, I loved our group and most of all I loved the way I felt when I left.  I don’t know if I’ve ever been this relaxed after exercising.


I just cannot wait to go back!!! Thanks Nancy!!!! Xoxo It even made me confident enough to go back to Pure Barre.  I woke up Sunday morning and found myself in Jenny’s cousins class, Ariel!!!  And it was serious.  I was welcomed back literally with open arms.  You really get to know people in this intimate setting!  My pal Brooke was there and then some PB friends, Camille and Karen.


Ariel is the living sweetest, but once that mic went on, it was business time…my butttttttttt!!! It aches in the best way.  This weekend I also went home and health shopping…


I got a tea kettle for my new tea obsession, some mason jars for juicing, a better knife, meat thermometer, some dish towels, yoga blocks, a pill caddy to keep all of my elimination diet supplements organized!!!!  I had a Bed, Bath and Beyond gift card from my lovely client who moved to Ireland, Mary and I finally joyfully spent it!  Thanks Mary!

Since I’ve started the elimination food plan to see if I have food allergies, I’ve already noticed that I have sensitivities to cinnamon and cayenne pepper.  Nothing major, but it was for sure harder to breathe after i ate them!  Imagine how great I’m going to feel getting rid of the things that make me feel bad!?!?  It feels so nice to be cooking again and in charge of my nutrition.  I’m not sure how I get so far from center but now that I’m feeling a little better, it actually is fun to meal plan, grocery shop and cook. I’m trying to think of just two days at a time, so I don’t over plan and get stressed out.  Also, it leaves room for creativity and what I’m actually craving…which lately is MUSHROOMS!!!  Lately I can’t get enough!



I love knowing that I have healthy things in my house to nourish and heal my body.  There are so few things i can eat on this list and brown rice and quinoa are two of the items, so I have embraced the grain for the next 30 days.  This weekend I made a mushroom, onion, garlic, leek gravy with oregano pan roasted chicken and tossed the whole thing with brown rice.


I also roasted zucchini, squash and onions and added it to the mix.  It was so good and satisfying!  I also experimented with some smoothies.  I cant eat bananas which is a smoothie staple for me!  So I mixed spinach,  unsweetened coconut milk, blueberries, mango, pineapple and fresh squeezed lime juice….um delish!  I also made a PBJish type smoothie with spinach, unsweetened coconut milk, blueberries, raspberries, blackberries and cashew butter.  Jenny tried it and said it was bland!!!  It so funny when you are so restricted how different things taste…I thought it was decadent! Haha.  You guyyyyyyys.  I Feel so flipping good!!!!  I’ve have learned so much about myself.  I tend to put all my happiness eggs in to my health basket.  I’m trying to change that so it isn’t so devastating when I don’t feel well.  So now I’m just focusing on positivity and celebrating when I feel great.  Thanks to all of you and if you aren’t doing yoga or have some form of peaceful meditation in your life, I can’t say enough wonderful things about it!!!  Love you all like woah!  Namaste. Ps: Y’all, this is our 302nd post!!!  It has been so crazy lately I missed the 300th, but what a ride this has been.  We are so grateful to every single person who reads our story.  Xo time a milly.

Two Meatballs: Aller-GEEEEEZ!!!!

Sara here!!! (Don’t worry, it’s both of us later on in the post!!!)  About 5 years ago I went and had an allergy test.  The kind where they prick your skin and then you look like a sheet of those candy dots all day!?!  It was fascinating and only mildly uncomfortable.  If you don’t know me yet…I love trying something new even if it hurts or is gross or tastes terrible or ends up being the living worst idea, I live for the experience and the knowledge!  This was no different.  It turns out that I am allergic to mold, dust, grass and most trees!!!  This made so much sense!!!  My Apple grandparents lived in Little Washington near the Pamlico Sound and this town is riddled with mold!!!  Its basically sea level so there is no avoiding it and literally every time I would go there I as a kid wanted to itch my nose clear off my face.  It was always a sick trigger which sucked bc it was also the funnest place ON EARTH!  Anyways with this new found info, I was told I should try immuno-thearpy where they shoot you up with small doses of what you are allergic to in the hopes that you will build up a tolerance.  With where I was in my life then and with my long hours at work, I just couldn’t/didn’t want to make it work.  Instead, I started taking Allegra daily and during high allergy/season change season, I had a nasal spray and two inhalers #areyousoturnedon!? which worked for awhile.  Well, it has popped up again and my mold allergy seems to be the root of my breathing issues!  First let me say, it is a relief to have a new avenue to go down.  Nothing that I took for my lungs was really working and it turns out my lungs were just the loudest byproduct of my intolerance to mold!  And with the upcoming season change, I need to be ready!!! I want to change my relationship with mother nature as I love her so much.


So whats a gal to do you ask!?!  Well, step one: make my house a safe haven!  Since I don’t want to move to New Mexico, the second best thing I can do is have a very clean and healthy home environment.  This makes so much sense!!!  So, I had a specialist come in and check the house for mold and there was some!  It was in my bathroom and it isn’t a ton! Removal and repainting scheduled. Check!  Next I will have someone come in and check all the duct work, my hvac system and install a whole house dehumidifier and air purifier.  Also, I need to take out the carpets upstairs and swap to hardwood (home remodel…hgtv here I come!) and lastly, get some house plants as they are amazing and natural air filters!  I’m am pleased to introduce you to the newest members of the Beard clan:


This tall drink of water is Bill Murray and he lives in my den.  The second triangle shaped cutie is Gilda Radner #roseanneroseannadanna and she lives in my bedroom and lastly, this lanky leafy love is Jane Curtain and she resides in the kitchen!  These are my 3 most used rooms in the house!  Feeling better already.  Now Step 2:  Food.  I don’t think it is any secret that I have not been eating well for months now and I am fully aware that it is not helping my cause.  Bad food makes me feel bad and the weight that I have gained is only exhausting me more.  When you know what it feels like to feel good, moving in the opposite direction feels so much worse. #whenyouknowbetteryoudobetter Thinking about planning a meal, grocery shopping, cooking…it just seemed so exhausting and out of the question for awhile!  But my holistic chiropractor suggested that I go on a sugar elimination plan to achieve two things; one to rid my body of candida and two to see if I have any food allergies!  Spoiler alert, I’ve been on it one day and I can already tell cinnamon and cayenne pepper make it hard for me to breathe!  I love learning!!!  Jenny is going to join me!  We decided to go out with a bang and enjoyed a lovely sushi date together before the cooking segment!


Tasu has hands down the best Merry Role of life!  Then we got deep on the ride home and talked about the concept of focusing our time and energy into being more loving and kind to ourselves.  Then Jenny started writing yesterdays amazing post and I started cooking from our very restrictive list of new acceptable foods.  We can basically eat, chicken, turkey, cold water fish, most veggies (no tomatoes, potatoes, corn…etc) most fruits (no strawberries, bananas, oranges, grapefruit, etc) and then olive oil, coconut oil, unsweetened almond or coconut milk, no dairy, no eggs, it is a very interesting list!  But the guidelines are helpful since all hell has broken loose.  We can also have quinoa which is a fun change and brown rice.  So on the menu is a Quinoa Breakfast Bake in the crock pot and baked chicken and roasted veggies!!!  It actually feels great to be back in the kitchen and making healthy things to put in our bodies!


We always have fun together!


But we were a little rusty!!!  It always comes back quickly though!



As I was peeling the apple, I thought about my Apples!


It felt like a really positive way to connect and spend a thoughtful mental moment together.  They would want me to be healthy and to feel good and you know what they say…an Apple a day…#loveyouguys #missyalleveryday #appleofmyeye

My house smelled so good.  The breakfast porridge as I kept calling it cooked all night and waking up to apples and nutmeg simmering was heaven.  We had a date in my car this morning and enjoyed a hearty oatmeal like thing with more texture.  It was a little bland, more salt next time!



We are so cute!  Later I had the baked chicken which was crazy good and the roasted veggies which are always a hit for lunch!  For dinner I’m going to make a spinach and blueberry smoothie!  I feel so great!!!!  Step 3: Move ya body body!  Exercise has been the hardest thing.  I miss it.  I kept wanting to go back to Sandra.  But even Pure Barre was wearing me slam out.  So, our good buddy Theresa who taught us how to juice, is going to start beginners yoga with me this Saturday!!!  I could not be more excited.  This feels like a nice, low impact, spiritual way to get my body moving and get some energy out without draining all of mine.  I love a new beginning! #yinandyang


It is an 8 week series where they take you through all the poses and it sounds like exactly what the doctor ordered. I love love loved yoga with Lila so I know this will be a hit!


Yay for new friends and new adventures.  I feel so much more grounded and positive and present.  I also feel really relieved to be doing something again.  I was told that i can’t worry about losing weight until I heal myself and these three things seem like a great way to get started.  Thank you for not losing hope in us.  We have both had moments of doubt, but we both know from the bottom of our hearts that we will stay true to our journey, no matter the path and no matter the time.  Who knew you’d find out so much about yourself and the world by taking your clothes off, putting your weight on a chalkboard and putting it out for the world to see.  I now want to be healthy on so many more levels than the number on my scale.  I’m really looking forward to feeling better and finding some healthier outlets…cant wait to share it all.  Sending all my love and deep cleansing breathes of relief your way. Xoxo

Also, our great friend Lauren at Fleet Feet wanted to pass along an awesome opportunity to get healthy in a group and to learn how to get moving and reach that 1st mile.  Here is the info.